Here are a few more strange questions and comments that occurred during my years as a Deputy Sheriff and County Sheriff here in Montgomery County:
• "See this knife? Sharp, ain't it? . . . You know what I've been doing, Sheriff? Cutting the heads off of copperhead snakes." (From a man who had been standing in front of the New Ross post office at midnight and asked me to give him a ride home. I took him home, but I was a little nervous during the trip. When I dropped him off, he told me that he would be glad to shoot anybody that needed to be shot . . . all I had to do was give him a call. Yes, he was serious.)
• "Watch out for the dog." (From a lady to whom I had just served court papers. I told her the Cocker Spaniel had been no problem at all, and she replied, "Not that dog . . . the OTHER dog." I hurried to my patrol car, got behind the wheel, and rolled up the window just as a GIANT, vicious-looking dog placed its front paws on the roof of my car, stared at me, growled, and bared its teeth . . . WHEW!)
• “Can you tell me what road leads to Indy?" (From an intoxicated woman, clad only in her bra and panties, who had driven her Mercedes Benz into a creek north of Bowers. The car was half submerged . . . and believe it or not, she was an emergency room doctor! Must have been a rough night in the ER.)
• “We don't know anything about it, officer." (From a group of teenagers who had just stolen a toilet from a service station on US 231 North. The toilet was sticking out from the trunk of their car. The driver had a wrench laying on his dash, and the top of the toilet reservoir was in the front seat.)
• "I just thought it was a nice night for a bike ride." (From a Wabash student who was riding his bike on a snow-covered street in downtown Crawfordsville one winter night. He had no clothes on . . . NONE. And yes, his fraternity brothers had dared him to do it.)
• "Well, Hi, Butch . . . doesn't the moon look nice tonight?" (From a married female cousin of mine who I caught parked under the Jim Davis bridge near Alamo late at night. The only problem was . . . that the fellow she was with was not her husband . . . OOOPS . . . I guess the honeymoon was over.)
• "Do you know who I am? I have been boating with Jeff George (the Colts quarterback at that time) at Geist reservoir." (From a very wealthy man who was drunk and ran off the road. Yes, I knew who he was, and yes, he still went to jail.)
• "Sheriff, I think I broke my back. I need to go to the hospital." (From an inmate who was laying on the cellblock floor one night after his cellmates had summoned a jail officer for help. When another inmate winked at me, I knew this fellow was faking his supposed injury. I informed him that he would just have to lay there. He was NOT leaving the jail. He then yelled that he would sue me for everything I owned. I told him to go ahead because I didn't have anything anyway. Guess what? He made a speedy recovery and was up and walking, smoking and watching TV five minutes later . . . It was a miracle!)
Like I said in a previous article, if you think you want to be a police officer, you can expect to hear just about anything.

John "Butch" Dale is a retired teacher and County Sheriff. He has also been the librarian at Darlington the past 30 years, and is a well-known artist and author of local history.